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About Dr. M and Molly
Dr. M is the author of five advice books, including Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? How to Have Fun, Survive the Preteen Years, and Remain True to Yourself, both written with her teenage daughter. Dr. M shares this advice column with Molly, a middle school student who loves to play soccer, dance, write and spend time with her friends.
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Dear Dr. M,
Nowadays, my best friend is always letting me down, because when we have to separate into groups, she always sticks with other friends and leaves me out. Even if I ask her if I can be in the same group with her, she just says, "Sorry but no," and I feel really hurt. Should I break up with her or still be best friends?
—Samantha, 9, New York
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Dr. M's Answer

Dear Samantha,
It's hard to be best friends with someone who treats you the way your friend is treating you. She's making it very clear when she says, "Sorry but no" that she doesn't value your friendship the way you do. What you haven't said is how she treats you when her other friends aren't around. Does she act like a real friend then? If so, then the friendship might be worth fighting for, and an honest conversation might help. But if she's basically avoiding you all the time, it might be time to end this friendship.

Illustration of Liz
Liz's Answer
Dear Samantha,
I think your friend answered the question for you. If the two of you were still best friends, she wouldn't be treating you that way, and you would be the first one she included in her group. If you want, you can try talking to your friend about how she's been acting or you can decide to just let her go. You're the one who has to make that decision.
 
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