Girls Only: Ask Dr. M: Family

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Dr. M is the author of five advice books, including Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? How to Have Fun, Survive the Preteen Years, and Remain True to Yourself, both written with her teenage daughter. Dr. M shares this advice column with Molly, a middle school student who loves to play soccer, dance, write and spend time with her friends.

Read more questions and answers in these categories:

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>	Boys

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Dear Dr. M,
My brothers and sisters and I always fight. There are a lot of kids in my family, ten actually, not including me. The youngest is Annie who is 2, the oldest is James who is 18. How can I do my homework when Annie is crying? How can I study when James is playing loud music? How can I sleep when Harry is practicing trumpet? How can I talk on the phone when Staci (4 years) is singing one of her preschool songs? How can I even eat, with the twins (14 years) having food fights every other meal? On top of it all, how can I get along with all of them? You don't have to answer all these questions, but it would be nice if you could at least answer ONE!

—Dawn, 8, Delaware


	Dear Dawn, I think that the most important question you asked is how you can get along with your sisters and brothers. There are some things that you can't control, like when baby Annie cries, so you may have to try to tune her out with some music. You might also ask your parents to help put together a family schedule that will allow you—and the rest of the family—some quiet time to study and sleep. If you have a cordless phone, you could take it into a quiet place, and you could tell Staci that you'd be happy to sing with her when you're finished with your phone call. Try to find individual solutions with each one, but don't expect a house with 11 kids to be quiet. On the other hand with so many kids around, you'll always have someone to play with.


	Dear Dawn, With your older siblings, I'd suggest talking to them about the things they do that annoy you or prevent you from getting your work done. Ask them nicely to stop and be open to compromise where each of you gives up something and gets something in return. With your younger siblings, compromise might also work, but it will probably be harder. Another thing you might want to do is find someplace in your house where you can go to be alone whenever your siblings are bothering you or you need to concentrate.

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